Diet culture, pervasive in society, often traps individuals in a cycle of restriction, indulgence, guilt, and shame. These internalized messages, stemming from unhealthy food rules and body dissatisfaction, can be inadvertently passed down to children if parents are not mindful. In the fourth episode of their podcast “After Bedtime With Big Little Feelings,” founders Deena Margolin and Kristin Gallant, along with Gallant’s husband Tyler, discuss how diet culture influenced their relationships with food and bodies and the harm these negative messages can cause.
For many, food was associated with rules, guilt, restriction, and confusion. Whether it was watching parents follow diet plans, hearing about “cheat days,” or being told to finish plates while being cautioned about attitude, these experiences shaped perceptions of food and body image. For some, this led to eating disorders, body hatred, or the shame of consuming “forbidden” foods.
To break this cycle, parents can take several steps:
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Recognize the Legacy to Avoid: Understand the harmful scripts passed down—such as the pressure to be smaller, eat less, and look a certain way—and commit to fostering a relationship with food based on trust, joy, and respect.
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Ditch the Shame, Keep the Structure: Serve a variety of foods without labeling them “good” or “bad.” Maintain structure with set mealtimes and cues without control or scarcity. Teach children how different foods affect their energy and focus without tying their worth to their diet.
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Make Food About Fueling: Encourage children to view food as fuel. Discuss which foods make them feel strong, full, and focused. Allow food to be fun without making it special or off-limits. Keep food neutral—it’s neither a reward nor a punishment.
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Move for Joy, Not for Size: Teach children that movement is about feeling alive and caring for their bodies, not about burning calories. Encourage activities like running, dancing, and stretching for the joy and benefits they bring.
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Normalize Body Acceptance: Model body respect by treating your own body with care, moving it, resting it, and existing comfortably in various situations. Show children that worthiness is not conditional and that all bodies are good bodies.
By implementing these steps, parents can help their children develop a healthy relationship with food and their bodies, breaking free from the constraints of diet culture.